Ugh. I hate the way this looks. Ugly orange stars. I hate orange.
Not too fond of a couple of my roommates either. Voices are starting to get to me. I want silence. Or Weezer.
Guys are starting to piss me off too. This is gonna seem incredibly mean and weird and shit but right now I feel like all any guy I know is interested in is sex. And Pamela Andersen lookalikes. They don't even seem to care that none of her is real. What the hell.
I feel like I'm surrounded by a ton of metal ladders. No wood ladders. All shiny metal.
Actually.. well, in philosophy and seminar we're doing the meaning of life, right? Thomas Nagel says that absurdity is the difference between what we imagine the world to be and what it really is. Like, you're being knighted and your pants fall down. I don't think that's absurd, but I don't really know what it IS, but it is SOMETHING. This has been bugging me since I did it. I don't know, I see absurdity as the inability to learn from the difference between reality and the ideal, i.e. wear a belt next time! BUT (and this is my point), whatever it is that IS the difference btw. reality and the ideal, that's what my life is now. I'm full of it. Like, I'll daydream about whoever's occupying my interests coming over and really being able to talk to him (I think at the mo' it's Brent) and shit and not only does he NOT come over but some OTHER guy (read: Ed) comes over and climbs on me and it's like GET THE FUCK OFF!!! Feel like all guys are dogs. Or maybe bunnyrabits. No, dogs, cuz the guys arodn here don't actually GET ANY. Yep, dogs, just jackin' off against the furniture...
and maybe you're scared to say
I'm falling for you...
I wish I could get my head out of the sand
cuz I think we'd make a good team
and you could keep my fingernails clean
but that's just a stupid dream that I won't realise
cuz I can't even look in your eyes
without fakin'...
Arg.
"Married in my mind."
That's so me. Or rather, to go back to the absurd thing, "I'm dumb she's a lesbian, I thought I had found the one..."
Actually. Chrissy just said "Yes Mom." A lot of people have beens aying that recently. I think that's what's bugging me. People are getting married all around me. I should get my monkey, I need a hobby. Chriss said to go call Erik. Maybe I will.
Readin'
Listenin' to
Thinkin' about
Most recently I was 
