you've got your ball, you've got your chain
tied to me tight, tying me up again
who's got their claws in you, my friend?
into your heart I'll beat again
sweet like candy to my soul
sweet you rock and sweet you roll
lost for you, I'm so lost for you
and you come crash into me
and I come into you...
in a boy's dream...
-DMB, Crash
Sometimes I feel like the worst evilest person in the world... Like I've completely wasted my life and I'm wasting the lives of all those who spend time with me or talk to me or listen to me and I know it but they don't and it's all just a matter of time before they find out and run away from me... like the only way I can keep friends is to stop them finding out what I'm really like in case they realise that I'm blackmailing them into talking to me by listening to them or something. Like once they sit down and think "why are we friends/together/talking/etc?", it's automatically so clear WHY that they never want to talk to me again, only right now there's something that's stopping them seeing the flaw. Gah. I feel dirty and twisted and wrong.
But not, strangely, depressed.
Readin'
Listenin' to
Thinkin' about