...I want to thank you for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you is having the best day of my life...
God, I feel like hell tonight
tears of rage I cannot fight
I'll be the last to help you understand
are you strong enough to be my man...
lie to me
I promise
I'll believe...
I sat in tim horton's today, waiting to go to work. had a coffee and boston cream. chantal kreviazuk started singing "leaving on a jet plane"- mike song. i sort of smiled, all melancholy. then i remembered his habit of tearing up coffee lids, and how i'd sometimes do it, just to be as absorbed as he was. so i started doing that, and nearly started crying in timmie's. not, as i said, because of i can't let go, but because what i wanted to hold on to isn't there, or available, at any rate, anymore. i was upset that i couldn't tear up the lid as small as i used to. i thought about calling him up to invite him out for coffee, but it's a long walk from their place and i'm sure he's busy and i had to go to work anyway. but still. i'd like to have at least that relationship again...
I'm not beautiful like you, CUZ I'M BEAUTIFUL LIKE ME...
life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone, i hear you call my name, and it feels like home...
i was wondering if maybe it was some big conspiracy to get something out of me... like, he knew all my favourite movies, books, knew the music i'd worked on (reviewing), knew the clubs, even said he knew erin... i mean, seems like he knew everything, anything that might i/ellicit (that spelled right?) a response from me. i know how implausible that sounds, and he did have the malhavoc CD and stuff... but still. i don't know. he seemed so genuine, esp. compared with his friend mike. so nice. pure. i don't know... it's so strange.
fourteenth street and the garbage swirls like a cyclone
three o'clock in the afternoon and I am going home
F train is full of highschool students
so much shouting
so much laughter
last night's underwear in my back pocket
sure sign of the morning after...
i hate the stupid 3-day rule. whoever made it up deserves a truckload of turkish soldiers. i was always really happy mike never paid attention to it. i would have thought he wasn't interested otherwise. i hope he shows up tomorrow. i really do. :) he likes hugging. i don't know!!!! i do like my freedom, knowing who i am, i'm so scared of losing myself again, but he's so NICE! =p arg. i hope...
Readin'
Listenin' to
Thinkin' about
Most recently I was 
