6 months today. "Wondering what relevance tomorrow is going to have in my lifespan... will it just be a passing thing, i day i won't remember in my life, like my last date with alex or the first time i went to grabba's, or will it be The Day, the day that marks The Beginning Of The Rest Of My Life? I'm scared, if only because it could be so much and so little and I won't know until it's gone. I have so little control."
6 months today.
And in hindsight... it's been fast. It's all whizzed by. The whole summer, sunday mornings, 6 months- faster than lightspeed. Why can't we slow down time? If we could freeze moments in time, we all would... Overall, fuzzy, happy, and fast. I wish I could just linger in a feeling-era. You know how you associate smells with certain times? CD plastic shrink-wrap for Xmas (Inever buy CDs otherwise.) Valentine's day is my mum's rose perfume I use if I have a date. Summer 2000 is Herbal Essences Shampoo, the one I didn't like, James' (James who? Don't know. Blank!) Sept- Dec. 2000 is slightly polluted air mixed with coffee, and later on, snow- Grabba's. Wet dog: Tweetie. He always smelled like wet dog when you bathed him, that's why we called him Stinky sometimes. And then, from time to time, I catch a brief whiff of other, nameless smells, which remind me of Larry, of Mike- pheromones? Sweat? Not sure. (Tempted to say I only date people who shower now, but that's cruel and Mikey doesn't deserve it. He showered.) Ah, cigarettes, but only "Export A's"- that's Mikey-time. I can pick them up anywhere. Last Easter, David (my godbrother) and gf Cheryl went out for a smoke, they came back in, Mum said "WHAT were you doing David?", he said "Smoke", I piped up "Export A's" and he's like "Nn- YEAH, HOLY SHIT HOW DID YOU DO THAT!" I'm like "I'm da man..." Anywhere. Probably even for as long as I live. Then again, Michelle's smoking that... what is it? Malborough? I can't remember now. Du Maurier, I think. She used to smoke Belmonts and everyone laughed about it. No, Du Maurier, I'm pretty sure. So does Scooooottt... :)
Anyway... point being, I associate time with smells. This summer was pumpkin pie, cakes (I baked!), bus exhaust, that cold-stale Accutech smell, and Rick-smell. And incense, but not now. And the smell of the very sweet instant coffee I used to make, first thing after getting home, since Rick doesn't drink coffee and there's NONE in the house. And grilled cheese... definitely the smell of grilled cheese....
And it all makes me very, very happy. :)
Readin'
Listenin' to
Thinkin' about
Most recently I was 
