Had written out another big long entry about how much I miss Grabba's (cuz it was like "Cheers"), and the stupid philosophy essay I'm still writing (which explains why I am not, at this moment, gettin' some sweet sweet luvin', dammit), and how much easier it is to have faith than to have logic, and stuff like that, and I keep forgetting that the "older" window sometimes opens into one that's already open, i.e. a window with my unsaved entry. Verdamt!
Was also musing on the fact that today is 9 1/2 months exactly. I can't believe how fast time flies. Because of safe-ness, and despite its easy-going, laid-back, golden quality, and despite aeons and eternities of Sunday mornings, this has still felt like the fastest relationship ever. Time's just blipped. Nearly a year has gone, but it still feels so brief, nearly like we're just starting. I guess that's partly because we only see each other a couple of times a week, instead of every day, like my other good relationships... Still. So much changes. A year ago... I was semi-interested in John (mostly because he was different. Non-TFS.) I was semi-hurt by James (I think that's who it was, it's hard to remember when I don't make specific references...) I was on an Ani kick. I was longing to be in love again (my theory that I have one great year, one crappy year, in love... I was on the bad year last year, this year's the good one... hopefully it'll last now? Break the pattern please? :) I thought Matthew was the greatest thing since sliced bread. He's probably one of the people I miss most from last year, despite the fact that I only met him twice, and that his gf creeps me out (tho she's very nice, according to Michelle.) Matthew was one of the very few people, like Aaron, and Steve, and also Larry, or maybe I should say Larry was the first, who made me feel like they could expand my horizons, teach me things. Make me smarter. Challenge me. I become obsessed with that characteristic when I find it in people, tho from experience they tend to be people I shouldn't date, either because of issues (theirs) or girlfriends (also theirs.)
Weird. I was just wondering if Alanis Morisette ever met Matthew (because I was thinking about "Ironic" - "It's like meeting the man of my dreams... and then meeting his beautiful wife..."), and what she'd think of him if she did, and then I remembered she HAD met him and she was a bitch. Hm. Well isn't it ironic? Doncha think?
And isn't it strange what we retain and what we forget, and also what we obliterate (James who?) And yet... and yet I think I've learned. Or matured, at any rate. Month by month. I've been getting better, stronger. More who I want to be. The change since last year is... incredible. I read old entries and feel I was so small then. And that's the way it should be, nyeh? Better than the other way around.
And here we come back to the fact that I've spent nearly a year in the company (and at the side of) Richard W. E. Snider, Esq., and despite its prelude (i.e. Nov.-April 2001), it's been the best year of my life. :)
Readin'
Listenin' to
Thinkin' about
Most recently I was 
